Union leader Elections.

Last week was the student election for the entire university. Basically, you elect the people who will represent you. A first taste of democracy and "freedom".

During the weeks leading up to it, there was pamphets and pieces of paper telling you who you should be voting for, the reasons why you should be voting for... and whatever.

I happened to pick up a copy of the "Election Semper 2006: Candidates policy statements", which was carelessly distrobuted on a desk at a common area.

Speaks quite a bit of the elections, no?

With 6 groups running for presidency alone (10 groups in total), you would think that this election would be full of propaganda, full of seriousness. A true election style which is almost identical to what we see in the real world.

Alas, that isn't so.

After 6 pages of the general blah where they speak about how the counting is done, the words of the candidates finally appears in page 7. On first read, Ben Riley, leader of a group named after himself (Ben), starts everything off interestingly. First, he smears the opposition (In this case, voice), then he talks about why he should be voted.

Looking good.

Then, the next group.

"Beer Lovers Australia"

Uh... what?

"A group with less beurocracy and more beerocracy!"

Uh... yeah. He promises a biceps workout in the red room (Social room with beer) every day from 11am - 4pm (O_o). He calls the election a "mis appropriation of student funds", and would spend the union's money on "things that matter - Beer vouchers, cigarette vending machines, and did I mention beer vouchers".

Ok...

...

Next team.

"The Spanish Inquistion"

...

One look at their "speech", and you see lots of boded words. One which picks up is "NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISTION".

...

After reading a little more closely...

"Hi, my name is Matt Brown, I am the presidential candidate for THE SPANISH INQUISITION."

Looking good.

Now, to things they SHOULD have Bolded

I am really just a puppet, a marionette on a string a ventriloquists dummy with someone's hand up my ... but anyway without any further ado, I shall hand you over to the guy who actually runs this outfit

So, in their speech, they said that their weapons are "Fear and surprise", and a "fanatical devotion to caffeinated beverages". Vote for them "for truth, justice, freedom and a hard boiled egg".

>_>

Next...

Voice.

Well, to be honest, Voice looks good. They don't go about smearing other people. They just say what they will do when they are elected.

The usual stuff. But good, serious stuff.

Then comes Truth.

The first thing you notice about what they said is "Please don't vote for us".

...

Then why run in the first place?

On more detailed reading, you'll realise that they are out to give you the "truth". They do nothing, but smear other candidates, their promises and their propaganda. They are just like leeches who whine and whine about some people who used \an8 on a sign instead of typesetting it properly.

They talk a lot, but they can't do a shit.

Next.

Keep left.

Yet another ridiculous name. But, what the hell. It can be good.

The president has run for, RAGE, Left Alliance, Activist Left, Diversity in Action, and now, Keep Left.

5 groups. O_o.

However, his speech is rather clear, as he brings to the table activities who will stand up to rights. Women rights, and the stuff.

I can go on for another 10 pages analysising every single position, but I won't. LoL. Exams in 3 weeks, and some lecturers' hints are about as good as no hints. (The chapters you should take more notice of is 5-12. >_>).

However, if you continue to read, Voice is the only team that continue on seriously. Some teams have gone on to praise coffee, praise beer, and praise god-knows-what else. Some others have gone on a insanely stupid and long story about mooses, and you still have no idea what they want.

The more interesting section is the NUS (National Union of Students). BEN's group described it as "an absolute joke and a waste of money". KEEP LEFT's candidate says that she is an AWESOME delegate to NUS, being delicated and superkeen. Yet, she wants to change the world, and "CLOSE DOWN THE G20!".

...

So, in comes voice, again, who says that NUS is important. This is totally different from BEN who has every member saying that they will crap away from NUS (but they didnt say how they will do it, of course). VOICE stays serious (almost too serious though), saying that they will bring UQ students matters to the table.

*shugs*

However, as you flip on, BEN's party become undone.

Pasting "BENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBE
NBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENBENB
ENBENBEN", is not the way to go, when some more smear can be put in place. Moreover, it shows that you aren't even serious about the election at all.

Oh well. Voice might win, but I don't think any one really cares. Ben stands a chance, since his campaigning at my campus was rather strong.

So, who did I voted for?

Nobody.

I'll vote when I decide that they are actually serious.